2013-05-31 7:37 a.m.
Fun Mom Visit
I'm just writing this so I remember. I think Mom's condition stresses me so much I forget things. Figures.
So my visit with Mom last night was one of the more "interesting". I talked to her earlier so she knew I was coming, but I came in the wrong door. She left the back unlocked and I came in the front when she had placed something in front of the door. I guess she doesn't feel safe where she is. Either that or she's afraid the cats will play with the handle. I know the one cat could open the doors in her old house, especially the lever kind.
So the whole point of that is that I probably pissed her off. So then I helped her with a lamp that needed a light bulb. The lamp is broken, the base comes off, but she forgot and was mad that the whole thing came apart. I fixed best I could and put in a new light bulb. Then we move on to the bedroom where she tells me that she saw both her favorite doctors and they say she doesn't have alzheimer's. She then asks if I want them to write up a letter. I tell her no, they already wrote letters. (Ugh!) She then wants to know what I think (again) and if I agree and wants to know what I think of her traveling. I tell her that I don't know if it's alzheimer's, but she does have memory problems. She seems fine to travel though. She wanted to fight, I could just tell. It was rather annoying. I did my best to stay calm.
So we move past that and on to the travel topic. She gives me the dates which don't match the dates she gave me earlier. I mention that and she says "Fine I'll change to a week!" WHAT? I have no idea how she got there, but the more I questioned or disagreed with the dates, the more she wanted to change the duration of the trip. So .... we made a few phone calls. Actually I tried to find the information. I knew she would have written it down, but she didn't find it (she only really looked on the calendar and in her ledger). I did find it a little later and it was a little bit confusing so we made phone calls. I confirmed the dates (which were close to what she told me the first time). We then called the person she is visiting to confirm the dates with her. She had different dates (glad we called). We kept the duration the same because that's what the other person did want.
Then we moved on and played cards. She was calmer after that, but I was flustered. Still am. I don't know how to deal with something that Mom doesn't acknowledge. I don't know how to get her help when she is insulted by anything having to do with it. She was mad about moving again. It was weird to have that conversation with it so clearly peppered with things that indicated it needed to happen. Things she doesn't even see.